Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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