when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize