spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
