I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
Banned from zoo.
Again?
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Someone shattered a urinal.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
