We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
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