I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
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