Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Still dying that you shit outside
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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