i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize