Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
