once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
We are two peas in an std pod
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
