It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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