Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
