Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
only you would photoshop your dick
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Randomize
