I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
