he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
