At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
