So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
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