So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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