Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
