Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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