Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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