no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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