Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
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