is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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