i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
