I hate your face
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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