I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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