No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Randomize
