absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
