Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize