He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
