its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
There r osticjed everywhere
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Randomize
