Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize