He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
