It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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