All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
my shit smells like andre
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Randomize
