Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
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