I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
