that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize