Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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