he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
