I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I'm passing your future prison.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
