When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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