Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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