So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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