guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize