So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
