somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
