Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
i am craving dick and cupcakes
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
