What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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