I'm going to jail i love you
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
